Fried and Spanish Rice Recipe

I make stir-fry, and Mexican food at least once a week. Rice is a big part of my family's meals, so I have had a lot of practice on how to make it well, and cheaply. I have tried several ways to make it, and the following recipe is the best, by far.

Now, I have to admit, right off the bat, that these are not authentic recipes. I am not claiming they are native to the Spanish, or Asian cuisine. I just like the way this technique comes out, so it's what I use, and I figured maybe a few of you might be able to use it, too.

The basic recipe is:

-1 1/2 Cup rice
-3 Cups Liquid/broth
- Oil for sauteing

Super Easy Creamy Noodle Salad

This recipe is a favorite in my house. I make it for every holiday, and barbeque.  It's easy to make, and is really tasty. There is a lot (and I do mean A LOT) of variation with this salad. That is why my measurements will be a little on the suggestive side. I would always recommend using the least amount, then letting it set for a few hours before adding more of the items that might make the noodles too soggy, or runny.  You can always add more dressing, or mayo, but you can't take it out once it's mixed in. The consistency tends to change a bit after it chills.

What you will need:

* 2 1/2 C. of spiral noodles (I typically try to use about 1 cup of wheat noodles to make the salad as healthy as possible without effecting the taste too much)

* 1 can of olives-chopped

* 1 cucumber diced

* 1/4 to 1/3 cup Italian dressing

* 1/3 to 1/2 cup mayo

Directions:

Cook pasta according to package directions. Drain and rinse with cold water.

Mix the other ingredients with the noodles, and chill.

There is a lot of add ins one can use to spice up this salad.  I like to put in about a quarter of a chopped onion.  Also, grape tomatoes, bacon bits, and cubed cheese  make a nice addition.

This recipe makes a generous size bowl of salad, enough to feed several people.

Quiche- How I got My #Autistic Son To Eat Eggs

Today's frugal breakfast might possibly not be all that sensory friendly to a lot of kids with sensory issues, but it is the only way I have gotten my Bean to eat eggs, which is a big deal to me!  I love quiche.  I eat it almost everyday.  It's quick to put together, but takes a little while to bake.  I can put almost any odd and end leftover vegetable in there, and it tastes great. Got a tablespoon, or 3 of tomatoes, green chiles, green peppers, green beans, carrots, cabbage, squash, bacon, ham, sausage.(and so many more) leftover?  Save it for breakfast.  Sometimes, when I have just a small amount of any of those foods I put them into a sandwich bag, label, it and freeze it.  Works for quick soups, or quiche.

Brownie Mistake Cake #Recipe

A couple days ago I was in the kitchen preparing what I meant to be a delicious, light, fluffy white cake. I generally have my own recipe for improving on box mixes, but for whatever reason on this day I mismeasured, or misthought, or... I don't even know. I ended up adding way too much milk. I didn't realize this until I was spooning the mix into the cupcake liners. I noticed that the batter was really runny, and then my mistake dawned on me. Oh no! I didn't have another cake mix on hand. I didn't just want to toss out what I had made, but what could I do with a runny cake batter? I began digging through my pantry and came across a box of brownie mix. Could this work,  I wondered. What else could I do? So, I mixed the brownie mix into the cake batter and hoped for the best.

I was not disappointed! Oh man, ya'll, this cake was good. Like, I'm gonna make it again like this, but on purpose good! So, I thought maybe some of you might like to try it, too.

Notes before you get started: I don't know if you can use another flavor of mix and get the same result. The same goes for using the whole egg. I would surmise that doing one, or both, would change the texture, but I am not sure on that. White cake mix is lighter, and has a different texture to it than other kinds, probably due to the whites being used as opposed to the whole egg.

Brownie Mistake Cake

*1 box white cake mix
*2 1/2 cups of milk
*2/3 cup of butter [softened]
*5 egg whites
*1 box of fudge brownie mix

Thoughts for 2017

In one of my recent posts I posed a few questions to get me (and hopefully all of you) thinking about the things I'd like to bring into this year, and where my mindset is in relation to my goals. I wanted to have this post done before January 1st, which is funny to me, since it's now January 22nd. Sooooo, as you can tell, my new year is busy. It's okay, though. It happens.

Let's dive in with the questions.

What has gone right/well this year? How do you plan to keep facilitating this into next year?


For me I would say that my relationship with my husband has improved, and he has been helping out around the house, and with the kids so much more. I would facilitate this by encouraging him, and making sure he knows I appreciate him, which are not my strengths, so that will take some work on my part to remember.


What has not gone as well as you'd hoped, and how do you plan to cope/change with it this next year?

How To Make 5 Meals Using Only 1 Chicken

When I am really needing to be frugal for a week's worth of groceries one of the items that lands in my cart is a whole chicken. It takes a lot of time spent in the kitchen, but you can make a chicken last for up to 5 (sometimes 6, but that isn't always possible) meals on the cheap. When I am less inclined to take all of the fun out of a succulent roasted chicken my family loves I can make it last 2, or maybe even three meals. Chicken is also a lean meat that is healthy. Most things you can do with a roasted chicken doesn't involve a lot of things like frying it, and whatnot, so you end up with a frugal meal that is good for you, too.

I know many of these steps are what many would consider common knowledge, but I am being very detailed for those reading that don't have a lot of kitchen experience, and especially not a lot of budgeting experience. I remember being 18 on my own, and not having a clue how to stretch my money to last. I wish someone would have laid it out for me step by step.

So, how do I do it?

Step One:

Letting Go Of Pain From The Past With Compassion

The other day  I ran across this this article about dysfunctional families.  It took me aback a little bit.  I held the words in my mind processing it for days now.  This is how my mind works.  I mull things over adding bits and pieces of information and understanding, until I build a better understanding of a new concept.  This process can take days, or it can take years. 

As a child, I was always acutely aware of my mother's sensitive feelings. I wanted to make her happy, and proud of me.  When I had class parties I'd always pick out the candies and treats she'd like best, before eating any myself.  I'd burst in the door with excitement presenting the treats I'd gathered for her.  I'd do the same at gift shops at class field trips. I'd use most of the money I'd been given to buy her something before I would myself.  Sometimes, I'd not buy myself anything at all.  While the other kids were busy thinking about what they wanted to buy, or what would make them happy I was busy trying to make my mother happy.  This is as one might have surmised by now, an endless task, as well as not my responsibility.  It's unfortunately one in which I've carried with me as one of those painful lessons you learn as a child.  I never learned to look after myself first.  Of course, there are positives to this, in that I am a generous person and will share anything I have with anyone in need.  I can and do get taken advantage of, as well.  I attracted people that were abusive to me and I accepted their abuse as just the way it is in grade school, all along until adulthood.

My father is likely on the spectrum himself, and was emotionally unavailable, as well as physically due to working long hours.  When he was around, he expected order, and quiet.  He never gave compliments and always let you know in a harshly critical manner when you were wrong.  I stayed away from him as much as possible, because we didn't get along.  I got no support from him and my ability to out-argue him relentlessly got me labeled a troublemaker.


As you might imagine, my father was completely unable to handle my mother's wildly swinging emotions and need for empathy.  He is simply unable to do so and she is unable to regulate herself.  I firmly believe she has Borderline Personality Disorder.  The two together is a recipe for disaster.  I became the person that things hinged on.  If things were good, I was good.  If things were bad, I was bad.  I was/am the scapegoat in the family.  My mother's mental health declined year after year.  By the time I was in my adolescence she was pretty neurotic.  With me about to leave the home, and my brother most of the way grown she wasn't as needed anymore.  She saw things that weren't there and accused me of doing things I never did.  If I got a new friend, a boyfriend, or even an interest that took my time away from her... she'd come up with something that I had done or they'd done to keep me away from them.  Even going so far as to admitting me mental hospitals, so she could get pity from family.  She believed that I summoned evil spirits to terrorize her and so many other things that were equally as crazy.  Child Protective Services tried to remove me from the home at age 17.  My mother said I was responsible for that, too and refused to speak to me for quite awhile after that. 

I was tragically scarred by these experiences.  As an adult now, I am putting things into perspective, allowing healing and new growth.  One of those processes is understanding what on earth made my mother behave the way she did/does.  As a mother myself, I can't fathom treating my kids that way.  I have asked this question many times over, and the answer I believe is in this quote:

“When another person makes you suffer, it is because he suffers deeply within himself, and his suffering is spilling over.” Thich Nhat Hanh"

 

I know my mother suffers.  She suffers greatly.  She can't help, but to let it pour over onto others, infecting them with her pain.  The last two years we are not on speaking terms at all.  Her pain of feeling abandoned by me was more than she could handle.  A conversation couldn't go by where out of the blue I'd be told how all of my struggles with my ASD kids are my own fault for moving away from her.  She won't visit me, because I made my own bed, so now I can lie in it, as far as she's concerned.  Or if I'd be asking for advice about my daughter she'd drop in that as long as she doesn't grow up to be ungrateful and mean spirited as me, then I'll have escaped the real pain of motherhood that she has endured.  I finally could take it no more.  I told her to get help to manage her pain, or leave me alone.  She chose leaving me alone.  That was painful.  It was awful for me, and I am still gathering up coping skills to help me deal with it.  I don't think anyone ever really gets over something like that.  So, if anything I have derived some comfort in knowing that it's not me, or about me.  She just can't contain her massive amount of pain and agony. This may be an important part for me to move forward, and letting myself feel worthy of love, life and joy.

Catching Up

Hello everyone! This is going to be one of those catch up, update, rambling type of posts. I think some people like to read these, and some some don't. I just feel that it's been awhile, not only since I posted, but since I posted any kind of personal entry that wasn't a recipe, or how to informational type of content,so I was overdue for a real chat with you all.

So, why have I gone MIA on this blog? A lot of reasons, really. It's not a complicated story, just tedious, and boring. You know, life stuff. My husband has been really ill with a gastronomy issue that has yet to be identified by doctors. It's been ongoing for about 8 months now. That has been difficult to contend with as I adjust to doing more where he can't. I also still have chronic migraines and more. My oldest was married in late September, so that also took a lot of time, and energy. We decided to get a kitten, then two days later found a litter in our carport. Hahahaha. Some were in poor health, and required extra care. I am glad to say they are all doing great now, and ornery as ever. Almost completely potty trained, too! They are too adorable, and I blow up every social media site I am on with their pictures!

The Nostalgia of Ink and Paper

 I grew up loving the tactile feel of stationary. Journaling stationary, postcards, greeting cards, notebooks and more, all empty, awaiting the perfect moment when a person's imagination turns to a creation. What once was a private concept born of a mind's eye becomes a tangible expression of thought to share, communicate with others. All the empty pages ready to soak up the contents of one's mind.

It's a writer's curse and blessing to see such potential of these pages. The smell and feel of new, unused pages bound by spines and spirals feels fresh, elegant  but intimidating. The first words set a tone. They must match the energy this empty book deserves. Will the first scribbles miss the mark? What if they land flatly on the paper, forever staining it with subpar markings? Oh, the anxiety of new beginnings!

I still have quite a modest collection of stationary. I find that I utilize them in fewer and fewer creative ways and much more as daily doldrum type tasks. To do and shopping lists tend to fill the pages where my inner most thoughts used to go.

As I grew up, the bound pages turned to blank, stark white single papers twisted firmly into a typewriter. The keys were concave and slick. The letters struck the paper with force, imprinting it with neat, ink letters. Tick, click, tick, ring. It was also tactile , but in a different way.

That way of filling pages soon turned digital from there. The keyboard still made a clicking noise, but more subdued. The paper would be a blinking curser on a screen until I filled it with letters, no paper to be seen unless I decided to print my creation.

Now, the keyboard is a screen and there is no clicking to be heard. I miss the feeling of taking pen to paper, even if I do appreciate the ease and efficiency of digital writing. There was always a quiet beauty to stacks of filled journals or a recipe box of small note cards neatly written, ready to be flipped through.

Guilt and Self Blame The Perfect Recipe For Depression?

Today, as I was cleaning out my email of various news alerts that I get on a few subjects I came across this article Was Freud Right About Depression and Guilt?   It talks about using an FMRi machine to track brain activity in people as they imagine a scenario of being rude or bossy to another person.  The findings were of significance in that the brains of people who are prone to or that have been depressed there was not the same amount of activity in both the  the anterior temporal lobe ( part that measures socially appropriate behavior) the subgenual region of the brain  ( area that measures feelings of guilt ) as there was in the other control group who were not prone to depression. This is suggestive that depression may rise from more than just normal sadness, and be in part caused by feelings of guilt and self-blame.  People with depression may not be linking up their 'bad' behavior with the feelings of guilt appropriately , thus leaving them to assign blame to themselves for things that aren't their fault.

I would say that in my experience, this could very well be true.  I would also surmise that it could be a case of chicken and the egg, as well.  Did the depression occur first, tainting everything, or was it this underlying brain difference that ultimately lead to the depression?  I am also wondering if this over-reaching guilt and self blame causes damage in the long run to thinking patterns becoming more permanent?  Like, ruminating over the perceived bad behavior might cause the problem to grow and become rooted in the person's mind as an unshakable truth, rather than a theory. I would also think this would cause issues in the person's relationships.  Being overly apologetic and ready to accept blame would be likely to attract a kind of partner and friends that would be willing to let you carry it.  Manipulative sorts of people might be drawn in by your willingness to accept the blame for all that went wrong the relationship.  This would almost reinforce your feelings of guilt, sadness, and possible low self worth.

I know in my life, that I have been the "I'm sorry" person.  The one that said that as almost a knee jerk reaction to everything, whether it was my fault or not.  This gives me something to think about in terms of how I view myself in situations where I think I may have behaved badly. The guilt that seems to be so often a part of the relationship equation may just be the way I tend to go with my thought process and something I can learn from.  It may just be worth keeping in mind the next time I assign myself blame that I could be overdoing it.

Inner Aspie is No More!

I'm sure that many of you have already noticed that I have changed my FB page to Thoughts of an Introverted Matriarch.  Now, it's time to change this blog, as well.

I have been moving away from the term 'aspie' for awhile, and am wanting to incorporate a broader theme to my writing. You might have noticed that I am blogging about recipes, and other topics in addition to autism lately.

The Depth of My Introversion

Here this last couple of weeks my household has been nonstop busy. From more than one of us being at the ER, to gas lines being broken in our backyard, to planning for my daughter's wedding coming this Saturday, then some. There's always a time sensitive situation brewing just under the surface of my every day.

For an extremely introverted, autistic person such as myself this is a bittersweet recipe for disaster.

On one hand, it's fun to do things with loved ones, like attend festivals, and getting together for dinners. Weddings are lovely events designed to celebrate the union of those we love. These are the things that make memories, and bind us together as we share in fun times together.

On the other hand, these events always have a falling out with me, unless they are extremely spaced out from each other. With every social interaction, and extra errand I leave me house to complete I feel a little bit more of my energy drain away. It's the times in my life that I love to hate.

I don't know what to call it, maybe shutdown? Not quite a meltdown, I don't think, but a couple days ago after I woke up preparing for yet another day of errands, and social activities in the evening my brain just spilled over. The overwhelm left me stuck in neutral on the outside as I felt myself sink on the inside into a sea of anxiety, and urgency to escape myself. Every noise was deafening, and I gulped for air as I searched for a bubble of silence. At first I rebelled against these feelings. I began to question my own mind. What happened? The immediate answer was nothing. I just felt assaulted by overwhelm causing my environment to feel as if it was attacking me. Thankfully, my husband asked if I needed to rest, and I accepted his offer. I rescinded into my dark bedroom with a tiny bedside lamp, and cocoon of weighted blankets, doing nothing for a bit until I fell into a small nap.

Ahhhh... Recovery.