It's getting to be be the latter part of October. The leaves are beginning to fall quickly from the trees and the colors are changing from olive greens to yellows and some rusty reds. In Kansas it's not always predictable what type of fall you'll get. Sometimes it might get too cold too quickly causing the leaves to fall from the trees before turning many colors at all, or other times there can be spectacular bursts of cascading colors that lasts into November.
Much like our fall my physical health is this way, especially this time of the year. Unpredictable. A few years ago when the migraines began to take hold I noticed that in fall they would get noticeably worse more years than not. I am kind of waiting to see how this one pans out. So far not much of a change in the norm of how it's been. I was finally able to see a specialist, so maybe a solution, or at least an improvement in the severity is on the horizon? Fingers crossed.
Tomorrow is Bubby's last IEP meeting. Yes. Last. He will graduate high school in May. He will turn 18 in about 2 weeks.
I will let that sink in for a second for long time readers. 😂
Showing posts with label IEP. Show all posts
Showing posts with label IEP. Show all posts
Monday, October 21, 2019
Monday, October 22, 2018
Who is Turning Seventeen?!
I know it's been a minute since I have blogged. It's been even longer since I've written a personal, from the heart, rambling post. Time always has a way of slipping by. I intend to get over here all the time to write about this or that, but something else always comes up.
I've noticed that blogging in this kind of sense isn't as popular anymore. Most people are using YouTube for this type of thing and reserving blogs for business. That has made me wonder if I should keep writing. I have thought about vlogging, but it's just not the same to me. I don't love being on camera. Speaking doesn't allow me the creative room that writing does. It does allow more available time, I would think, but that is likely the only positive I can think of for that platform. So, for now I will write as time allows.
This week is going to be busy with a lot of big things. I have IEP meetings for both of the boys, or should I say "young men"! Ha ha. They are both in high school now. I am still homeschooling Beans, but he still gets speech services through the school district.
Bubby is a junior now and his meeting will be highly focused on transitioning out of high school and into some kind of vocational school, or program. He has stood firm in that he doesn't want to attend anymore schooling after high school, so I guess maybe it will be a program? They do have several around here that he can get started doing soon. It's an exciting and anxious time for me. I feel so nervous about helping him to make decisions. It feels like the beginning of school again, I guess. I used to feel so intimidated by the school administrators and think that it all seemed so scary and permanent. I realized a couple years ago that it wasn't as hard as I was making it out to be, and that I had all kinds of options for schooling if one didn't work out. I was stressing too hard over nothing. Now I have that part figured out, here comes another new chapter that feels scary. Guess that's how it goes.
Bubby will also be turning 17 Friday! He was so little when I began this blog. I can't believe he's already going to be 17.
Of course it's fall again.
I've noticed that blogging in this kind of sense isn't as popular anymore. Most people are using YouTube for this type of thing and reserving blogs for business. That has made me wonder if I should keep writing. I have thought about vlogging, but it's just not the same to me. I don't love being on camera. Speaking doesn't allow me the creative room that writing does. It does allow more available time, I would think, but that is likely the only positive I can think of for that platform. So, for now I will write as time allows.
This week is going to be busy with a lot of big things. I have IEP meetings for both of the boys, or should I say "young men"! Ha ha. They are both in high school now. I am still homeschooling Beans, but he still gets speech services through the school district.
Bubby is a junior now and his meeting will be highly focused on transitioning out of high school and into some kind of vocational school, or program. He has stood firm in that he doesn't want to attend anymore schooling after high school, so I guess maybe it will be a program? They do have several around here that he can get started doing soon. It's an exciting and anxious time for me. I feel so nervous about helping him to make decisions. It feels like the beginning of school again, I guess. I used to feel so intimidated by the school administrators and think that it all seemed so scary and permanent. I realized a couple years ago that it wasn't as hard as I was making it out to be, and that I had all kinds of options for schooling if one didn't work out. I was stressing too hard over nothing. Now I have that part figured out, here comes another new chapter that feels scary. Guess that's how it goes.
Bubby will also be turning 17 Friday! He was so little when I began this blog. I can't believe he's already going to be 17.
Of course it's fall again.
Saturday, September 2, 2017
Back to School Anxieties and Solutions
By now, almost all public schools have gotten the first day of fall classes out of the way. Many, like ours, have been in session for almost two weeks now. New routines can be hard for some people, especially autistics. I think it's safe to say that most people in general struggle with back to school time, because of the complete turnaround of scheduling, and daily tasks.
One thing that I've noticed is most kids in general have a certain level of anxiety, and apprehension the first few weeks of school, even "typical" kids. Everything is new. New teachers, new classroom, new schedules. Not to mention that many have transitioned into totally different environments, like from grade school to middle school, or even middle school to high school. They wonder if their friends will be in their classes, how their new teachers will be, and how this year is going to go for them. Some have to learn how to switch classes for the first time, or use a locker. (Those locks are anxiety producing for some of us!)
If your child has had a less than stellar experience so far, or their attitude has been not great, then it may be overwhelm caused by the new routine. Keep the lines of communication open between you, and them by asking them how they like school so far in specific ways. Ask what their favorite part of the day was, and what was their lest favorite, Ask who their locker is by, and how they feel about their teacher. If they're really seeming to have a hard time it might not be a bad idea to let their teacher(s) know. That way the teacher can keep an eye out for things your child might need assistance with, or even just throw some encouraging smiles, and conversation their way to reassure the child that they're a positive influence for them. Some kids are too shy to reach out first.
If you have a child whose needs are exceptional you may want to write an introductory letter to their teachers like this. It is helpful for the teacher(s) to get to know some of the basic needs your child has, and how to meet them, beyond the IEP.
One thing that I've noticed is most kids in general have a certain level of anxiety, and apprehension the first few weeks of school, even "typical" kids. Everything is new. New teachers, new classroom, new schedules. Not to mention that many have transitioned into totally different environments, like from grade school to middle school, or even middle school to high school. They wonder if their friends will be in their classes, how their new teachers will be, and how this year is going to go for them. Some have to learn how to switch classes for the first time, or use a locker. (Those locks are anxiety producing for some of us!)
If your child has had a less than stellar experience so far, or their attitude has been not great, then it may be overwhelm caused by the new routine. Keep the lines of communication open between you, and them by asking them how they like school so far in specific ways. Ask what their favorite part of the day was, and what was their lest favorite, Ask who their locker is by, and how they feel about their teacher. If they're really seeming to have a hard time it might not be a bad idea to let their teacher(s) know. That way the teacher can keep an eye out for things your child might need assistance with, or even just throw some encouraging smiles, and conversation their way to reassure the child that they're a positive influence for them. Some kids are too shy to reach out first.
If you have a child whose needs are exceptional you may want to write an introductory letter to their teachers like this. It is helpful for the teacher(s) to get to know some of the basic needs your child has, and how to meet them, beyond the IEP.
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
The Autistic Student- Won't vs. Can't
It seems pretty common to hear parents of ASD children talk about a time when someone told them that their child can't or won't be able to do this, or learn that. I come across stories like that all the time. As wrong as I think that is, that has been rarely my experience with my kids, or even myself. As a matter of fact, it's been the opposite.
I don't know how many IEP meetings that have been called by me to discuss services for Bubby. No one has ever said "He can't do it." It's always been "He can if he tried."
I don't know how many IEP meetings that have been called by me to discuss services for Bubby. No one has ever said "He can't do it." It's always been "He can if he tried."
Thursday, October 3, 2013
The Next Chapter- #autism and #injustice
If you're unfamiliar with the entire story you can get up to speed here and here .
I'm sitting in a blissfully quiet house sipping coffee, contemplating my day, my week, and what to do next after a devastating outcome to what appears to be the final meeting with Bean's special ed provider at school.
I was not able to persuade them to allow Beans to go to another school. They stated it violates Least Restrictive Environment, due to the other structured learning room being further away than the one he was attending. I know that there will be 20 comments about how I can fight that, but their wording, and their reasoning doesn't have to make sense. I had 2 of the best advocates in my entire state helping me through this. If there was a way to fight effectively against our special ed coop they would have done so. If there was words to use, and ways to fight that wouldn't be wasting my time, and money they'd have jumped on that opportunity. The fact is, our local special ed coop is run pretty much like our government. We all know they're not doing things right by the people, but there isn't much we can do. We can take it to the courts, where their friends, and acquaintances work, and there is rarely ever a judgment in the parent's favor. Government agencies rarely like to step on the toes of other agencies.
With that being said, I am of course going to go forth with reporting the misconduct of the whole situation to
I'm sitting in a blissfully quiet house sipping coffee, contemplating my day, my week, and what to do next after a devastating outcome to what appears to be the final meeting with Bean's special ed provider at school.
I was not able to persuade them to allow Beans to go to another school. They stated it violates Least Restrictive Environment, due to the other structured learning room being further away than the one he was attending. I know that there will be 20 comments about how I can fight that, but their wording, and their reasoning doesn't have to make sense. I had 2 of the best advocates in my entire state helping me through this. If there was a way to fight effectively against our special ed coop they would have done so. If there was words to use, and ways to fight that wouldn't be wasting my time, and money they'd have jumped on that opportunity. The fact is, our local special ed coop is run pretty much like our government. We all know they're not doing things right by the people, but there isn't much we can do. We can take it to the courts, where their friends, and acquaintances work, and there is rarely ever a judgment in the parent's favor. Government agencies rarely like to step on the toes of other agencies.
With that being said, I am of course going to go forth with reporting the misconduct of the whole situation to
Friday, September 6, 2013
Back to School IEP Tips and Ideas
A few weeks ago I promised that I would share some tips about how Bubby's IEP meeting went.
It wasn't quite an 'IEP' meeting. I guess it was just an informal meeting designed to update old staff, and inform new staff about Bubby's needs. It was not to change, or alter the IEP, so I suppose that is the only difference. The whole team was there, as well as as the coordinator of our local educational coop's special ed dept as per my request.
First of all, it was a night, and day difference with the way the principal behaved with the Special ed. coordinator there. He still said a few things that were not in line with today's laws, and regulations, but all in all his obstinate, bully-ish demeanor changed to a subdued version of that demeanor. He barely concealed his contempt at having to use what he would consider nontraditional methods on his school, because he doesn't feel he should have to bend for any student, but rather if the student can't acclimate to his environment, then they should go to a different placement. But, since that is a violation of law I work my way around him. If you had not been up to date with Bubby's school situation here is my last entry about it.
First, here is the letter that I write every school year to help acquaint them with Bubby,. and his needs.
Hello!
At the beginning of every year I always like to make up a little info sheet about Bubby to hand out to teachers, as well as a shorter version for you to tuck away in your sub folders to help quickly acquaint substitutes with Bubby.
It wasn't quite an 'IEP' meeting. I guess it was just an informal meeting designed to update old staff, and inform new staff about Bubby's needs. It was not to change, or alter the IEP, so I suppose that is the only difference. The whole team was there, as well as as the coordinator of our local educational coop's special ed dept as per my request.
First of all, it was a night, and day difference with the way the principal behaved with the Special ed. coordinator there. He still said a few things that were not in line with today's laws, and regulations, but all in all his obstinate, bully-ish demeanor changed to a subdued version of that demeanor. He barely concealed his contempt at having to use what he would consider nontraditional methods on his school, because he doesn't feel he should have to bend for any student, but rather if the student can't acclimate to his environment, then they should go to a different placement. But, since that is a violation of law I work my way around him. If you had not been up to date with Bubby's school situation here is my last entry about it.
First, here is the letter that I write every school year to help acquaint them with Bubby,. and his needs.
Hello!
At the beginning of every year I always like to make up a little info sheet about Bubby to hand out to teachers, as well as a shorter version for you to tuck away in your sub folders to help quickly acquaint substitutes with Bubby.
Monday, April 8, 2013
School Update
As promised, I am updating about the school situation with Bubby.
I won't give you a run down of who said what, and a play by play, because that takes too long, and is frankly boring to read. It went, overall , well. As requested, the behavior consultant, and the autism specialist attended, as well as Bubby's special ed teacher. This wasn't really a strcuctured meeting, but rather a forum to throw out ideas, and strategies to take to the IEP meeting, so that we can amend the IEP appropriately. Normally, we would not have to hold a full meeting to amend the IEP, but since the staff seems to never be on the same page we will have a full meeting. I think the date was scheduled tentatively for the 25th, with the understanding that much of what we discussed would be put in place immediately.
We decided that it would be best at this time if Bubby never had any homework to take home. Instead, we found a space in his day where he could work on any unfinished work he might have at school. If there is no unfinished work, then he might have time to relax, and do something fun. This is going to make the rest of the team mad, because they vehemently disagree with the idea of no homework.
I won't give you a run down of who said what, and a play by play, because that takes too long, and is frankly boring to read. It went, overall , well. As requested, the behavior consultant, and the autism specialist attended, as well as Bubby's special ed teacher. This wasn't really a strcuctured meeting, but rather a forum to throw out ideas, and strategies to take to the IEP meeting, so that we can amend the IEP appropriately. Normally, we would not have to hold a full meeting to amend the IEP, but since the staff seems to never be on the same page we will have a full meeting. I think the date was scheduled tentatively for the 25th, with the understanding that much of what we discussed would be put in place immediately.
We decided that it would be best at this time if Bubby never had any homework to take home. Instead, we found a space in his day where he could work on any unfinished work he might have at school. If there is no unfinished work, then he might have time to relax, and do something fun. This is going to make the rest of the team mad, because they vehemently disagree with the idea of no homework.
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
Square Pegs and Civil Rights
I mentioned some school issues with Bubby in the post before last New Places & Trying New Things. I left everything kinda up in the air during that post, and promised a follow up. So, here it is.
We did make it safely to the new counselor's office, despite sleet, blown tires, and broken windshield wipers. The counselor was very nice, and appeared to have a good understanding of autism. I was really nervous that she would either a). not know much of anything about autism, or even more so Asperger's. Or b). think that I am one of those moms that like to make a big deal out of nothing, and doubt he is autistic at all. So, I was relieved when my fears were baseless in reality. I think she and Bubby will get along great, and I look forward to continuing to see her.
So, that is a super positive in our corner.
The behavior consultant observed Bubby for the second time yesterday, and called me as I requested to discuss what she thought. The first time, it was all rainbows, and flowers. That worried me, because even though I know 2/3 of his day is pleasant as she observed, there is the 1/3 that is not, which is the third that is causing serious issues. This time when she observed it must have all just lined up right, because she was able to see his every button pushed, and severe meltdown ensue. I was not the least bit pleased at the meltdown in, and of itself, but that she was able to see it unfold. It's hard to write a behavior plan, and make recommendation on a student that you've never really seen the problem "behaviors". We discussed several things that may help on the phone. She also disclosed to me that she will be meeting with the special ed. teacher tomorrow to discuss with her what her thoughts were. I sent an email, and invited myself to the meeting. I'm sure the special ed teacher is less than thrilled with that, but at this point I feel I must get pushy. The behavior consultant also disclosed to me that she had at one point asked the special ed teacher if she would like for the county's autism specialist to come out, and do some training, and that idea was turned down. That did not make me happy, so I have called the autism specialist myself, and am asked for her to consult with the behavior consultant to decide the next steps should be. I have met the autism specialist a few times, and she is a bit abrasive, and difficult to get along with in a lot of ways, but I am desperate. This may backfire on me, but I have to take that chance. I asked around to people that have worked with her before, and the general consensus is that she does not work well with children, but is great at putting together plans, and training. So, I am feeling like bringing her into the picture is worth the risk.
So, at this point it is just a lot of research, and searching out the right people to help me help my son. The local advocacy center didn't have anymore ideas, than the ones I am already pursuing. I sometimes think I ought to get a job there. lol I am scouring our state's ed. website, and printing pages that speak to the issues we are having, and what the law says about Least Restrictive Environment, Behavior Plans, Present Levels of functional Performance, ect... I am also searching through Wrightslaw site to determine what actions I need to take, and what actions have been successfully taken by parents before. I am printing out documents of such court cases.
I feel like I am doing all that I can to ensure a proper education of my son in a regular ed environment. It may not be easy, but it is necessary. If all else fails, I will homeschool him, but that is last resort. To me, I am not just fighting this fight for him, but for every disabled child that comes through our tiny town's education system. They try to break them to fit them into what they want, and if they can't they send them to special classrooms in another town. Nope. Not happening here, if I can help it. He deserves to have a place in school, just like anyone else. He also is well liked, and accepted by his peers. It's the adults that are the issue here. It's time for outmoded beliefs, and ideas to get an update.
We did make it safely to the new counselor's office, despite sleet, blown tires, and broken windshield wipers. The counselor was very nice, and appeared to have a good understanding of autism. I was really nervous that she would either a). not know much of anything about autism, or even more so Asperger's. Or b). think that I am one of those moms that like to make a big deal out of nothing, and doubt he is autistic at all. So, I was relieved when my fears were baseless in reality. I think she and Bubby will get along great, and I look forward to continuing to see her.
So, that is a super positive in our corner.
The behavior consultant observed Bubby for the second time yesterday, and called me as I requested to discuss what she thought. The first time, it was all rainbows, and flowers. That worried me, because even though I know 2/3 of his day is pleasant as she observed, there is the 1/3 that is not, which is the third that is causing serious issues. This time when she observed it must have all just lined up right, because she was able to see his every button pushed, and severe meltdown ensue. I was not the least bit pleased at the meltdown in, and of itself, but that she was able to see it unfold. It's hard to write a behavior plan, and make recommendation on a student that you've never really seen the problem "behaviors". We discussed several things that may help on the phone. She also disclosed to me that she will be meeting with the special ed. teacher tomorrow to discuss with her what her thoughts were. I sent an email, and invited myself to the meeting. I'm sure the special ed teacher is less than thrilled with that, but at this point I feel I must get pushy. The behavior consultant also disclosed to me that she had at one point asked the special ed teacher if she would like for the county's autism specialist to come out, and do some training, and that idea was turned down. That did not make me happy, so I have called the autism specialist myself, and am asked for her to consult with the behavior consultant to decide the next steps should be. I have met the autism specialist a few times, and she is a bit abrasive, and difficult to get along with in a lot of ways, but I am desperate. This may backfire on me, but I have to take that chance. I asked around to people that have worked with her before, and the general consensus is that she does not work well with children, but is great at putting together plans, and training. So, I am feeling like bringing her into the picture is worth the risk.
So, at this point it is just a lot of research, and searching out the right people to help me help my son. The local advocacy center didn't have anymore ideas, than the ones I am already pursuing. I sometimes think I ought to get a job there. lol I am scouring our state's ed. website, and printing pages that speak to the issues we are having, and what the law says about Least Restrictive Environment, Behavior Plans, Present Levels of functional Performance, ect... I am also searching through Wrightslaw site to determine what actions I need to take, and what actions have been successfully taken by parents before. I am printing out documents of such court cases.
I feel like I am doing all that I can to ensure a proper education of my son in a regular ed environment. It may not be easy, but it is necessary. If all else fails, I will homeschool him, but that is last resort. To me, I am not just fighting this fight for him, but for every disabled child that comes through our tiny town's education system. They try to break them to fit them into what they want, and if they can't they send them to special classrooms in another town. Nope. Not happening here, if I can help it. He deserves to have a place in school, just like anyone else. He also is well liked, and accepted by his peers. It's the adults that are the issue here. It's time for outmoded beliefs, and ideas to get an update.
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Autie Exhaustion
Today, I am suffering from autie exhaustion. What is autie exhaustion, and how does it differ from regular exhaustion, you may ask. I am not exactly sure there is a cut, and dry answer to that. I think there are differences. I am fairly certain that 'typical' people get exhausted from being overstimulated sometimes, as well, especially introverts. I think introverts will certainly understand how this feels, even if they never quite feel the depth of it the way autistics can.
This kind of issue is usually cleverly camouflaged by quick moving moods, that tend to appear,and fade without warning in depths
This kind of issue is usually cleverly camouflaged by quick moving moods, that tend to appear,and fade without warning in depths
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Anticipating an IEP meeting
Tomorrow, I have an annual IEP meeting for Bubby at his school. We'll be updating his annual goals, as well as adding new ones related to his math issues. We just had one about a month ago to add language and spelling services to his IEP. I think I go to more meetings then a CEO. I got a call to schedule Bean's IEP yesterday.
Today, I will be gathering all of Bubby's report cards, progress reports, ect that I have not yet added to the monster 3 ring binder than chronicles his life. From the very first special ed testing, to every doctor's report. It's all there. Sometimes, I have info that they don't and they have to take copies of MY files. lol I have concerns about the work they're doing in speech therapy and am going to request to see data on progress. I keep letting that area go, and I need to put my foot down. Now that he is in the Intermediate Center (4th-6th grade or 9-12 year olds) the speech path is by far superior to the old one, so I have seen some progress in his conversational speech, particularly the ability to take more than one (even one is progress) conversational turn during a conversation. Just last year, he would ask you 100 million very personal questions and then walk away. If you asked him something, he would likely not answer, or if he did it would be short, without any info. As a matter of fact, the other day we were going through the annual questions to re-qualify him for community based services (or the &^%$ wait list, since there are no services being given at this time, only space on a list) and he did wonderfully on answering questions. Not only did I see him do well in answering the questions on topic, but he fibbed... not a big fib, but he anticipated what the socially correct answers were, and answered them that way. I was amazed. For example, he was asked " what do you do when you're lonely?" He answered " I find someone to keep me company." Or, "what do you do when you're bored?" He said "I find something to do to occupy my time." Which is untrue. Both of those things would have required assistance from me and he would have gotten relatively whiny about it, too. The thing is, he knew that on a social level it was embarrassing to say that he whines and has a fit when he's bored or lonely and needs me to redirect him. He also told the case manager that he prepares his own food and while he can do some things, he by far still needs me to do most of it. (and he has a huge meltdown every time I insist he try to make new things himself) It's been a slow process. The point is, is that he knew most 10 yo boys make their own snacks and that he was different. I really didn't think he had that concept of himself vs others, but I guess he does.
I have gotten off track on this post, babbling. :D I will be doing lots of research on dyscalculia and the evidence based treatment options today, so I will be posting lots of link on Inner Aspie's FB page if anyone wants to know more about it, I also apologize to those of you that already follow, but don't want to know more about it if I am clogging up your feed. Check back there tomorrow for results about the meeting.
Today, I will be gathering all of Bubby's report cards, progress reports, ect that I have not yet added to the monster 3 ring binder than chronicles his life. From the very first special ed testing, to every doctor's report. It's all there. Sometimes, I have info that they don't and they have to take copies of MY files. lol I have concerns about the work they're doing in speech therapy and am going to request to see data on progress. I keep letting that area go, and I need to put my foot down. Now that he is in the Intermediate Center (4th-6th grade or 9-12 year olds) the speech path is by far superior to the old one, so I have seen some progress in his conversational speech, particularly the ability to take more than one (even one is progress) conversational turn during a conversation. Just last year, he would ask you 100 million very personal questions and then walk away. If you asked him something, he would likely not answer, or if he did it would be short, without any info. As a matter of fact, the other day we were going through the annual questions to re-qualify him for community based services (or the &^%$ wait list, since there are no services being given at this time, only space on a list) and he did wonderfully on answering questions. Not only did I see him do well in answering the questions on topic, but he fibbed... not a big fib, but he anticipated what the socially correct answers were, and answered them that way. I was amazed. For example, he was asked " what do you do when you're lonely?" He answered " I find someone to keep me company." Or, "what do you do when you're bored?" He said "I find something to do to occupy my time." Which is untrue. Both of those things would have required assistance from me and he would have gotten relatively whiny about it, too. The thing is, he knew that on a social level it was embarrassing to say that he whines and has a fit when he's bored or lonely and needs me to redirect him. He also told the case manager that he prepares his own food and while he can do some things, he by far still needs me to do most of it. (and he has a huge meltdown every time I insist he try to make new things himself) It's been a slow process. The point is, is that he knew most 10 yo boys make their own snacks and that he was different. I really didn't think he had that concept of himself vs others, but I guess he does.
I have gotten off track on this post, babbling. :D I will be doing lots of research on dyscalculia and the evidence based treatment options today, so I will be posting lots of link on Inner Aspie's FB page if anyone wants to know more about it, I also apologize to those of you that already follow, but don't want to know more about it if I am clogging up your feed. Check back there tomorrow for results about the meeting.
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