Feeling Blue This Holiday?

Browsing through my FB feed I came across a blog entry from a mental health blogger that had me thinking. It was yet another one of those sentiments about being happy with what you have, because someone who has way less than you is happy with what they have. That was point, then later in the same article it spoke of not comparing yourself to others.....so... which one is it? Maybe, only compare if you're on the upwards swing, to remind you that you're blessed? While I get that sentiment, and I get the gist I am not on board with it.

While the holidays can be a wonderful time of year, full of giving, love, and family it can also be one of the most stressful times of the year, as well.  Not everyone has the money for the giving season.  Maybe one doesn't have any family, or friends to spend the holiday with. Maybe they might, but they're not pleasant people. We're not all born to loving parents, and other family members who care, nurture, and support us.  Some people suffer seasonal depression that tends to peak around the mark of the winter solstice with short days, and long nights. There's all sorts of reasons why a person might be feeling low, or less than festive around the holiday season.

Honoring Motherhood- How I learned to turn away from our mother-bashing culture, and embrace my own instincts.

I was doing some thinking since writing the entry How Can We Best Support Autism Parents? As I thought about the question I posed in the title I kept coming back to the slideshow of my worst parenting moments in my head. I know that I am not alone in those moments. I know that other moms feel this way , too. For this entry I am mostly referring to mothers.

Let me explain why.

As a group, mothers are judged so openly, and harshly by others about every move, decision, and idea we have. I rarely hear of fathers shouldering this kind of judgement. They might be judged on their finances, and employment decisions, but even that pales in comparison to the daily barrage mothers face.

Don't believe me? Here is a short list of things I have heard people say before in relation to mothers, and their ability to effectively parent their children. All of them are completely false judgements.

Why Inspiration Media Leaves Me Feeling Empty

In the last few years I have noticed that the world seems to be a lot more tolerant of differences, or at least one would believe so by our social media. You can't go far without seeing a motivational, inspirational message somewhere.

Don't believe me? Go check your Facebook wall. Check Twitter, and the front page of Yahoo, or wherever you get your news from. Go ahead...I'll wait check mine, too.

Ready to compare results?

Giving Others Your Attention and Respect

As I hung up the phone my stomach pulled in with anger rising up through my body. I am a mature person (most of the time) so I refrained from spewing it into the ear of the inconsiderate person on the other end of the receiver.

She just committed one of my all time most disliked pet peeves.It was a miscommunication, which is frustrating, but it wasn't just the misunderstanding it was the careless way it was delivered that makes me upset. This happens to me frequently when I talk to office associates, but none as often as doctor offices. I get it.  I really do.  They get so many calls a day, and I am certain that most people want to tell them their life story, never getting to the point.  I answer the phone for my husband's tree business, and out of what every customer tells me during the majority of the calls only about 25% of it is necessary information. This is with people inquiring about their trees, yards, and lawn sprinklers, so one can imagine that being times ten with people calling about a health related concern. So, I do empathize that they have to move through conversations quickly. I get that they probably get used to filtering through about 1/3 of what they hear to get the really necessary info. The thing is, I don't speak that way. I am on a need to know basis with everyone. If you filter though any of my words you're not gonna end up understanding any of what I am asking, or trying to state.

The conversation went like this:

Awkward Encounters of an Autistic Woman

It happened again.

I am strolling through Walmart, actually power walking, because that is my usual speed. I round the corner of the cereal aisle, and out of the corner of my eye I see a lady, and a boy. I think to myself that that person looks a bit familiar, but then I am in an area shopping where there's a lot of people I see frequently that I don't know. I get a couple feet away, and I hear "Where is the rest of your family?" It's the lady that I passed. I study her, and her son's face for a moment, and realize she is my husband's cousin. She is offended. I have done this to her before. I try to explain that when I am shopping I am in the zone,and not paying attention. This isn't the first time I have blogged about my Face Blindness. I know that I have made so many social mistakes with this particular person that there is no way to fully recover. I just try to be gracious possible about the incidents, and hope she just thinks I am a bit loopy, and not snobby. It's not personal.

The other times it has happened it was with people I barely was acquainted with. Those situations I can kind of shrug off, because it's not that unusual to not recognize an acquaintance you don't know very well. However, I have known this person for over 16 yrs. I don't see her often, but honestly I should recognize her. As I thought about this after I got home another similar memory came to mind.

It was 15 years ago, just after my daughter was born. I was going out to dinner with my husband, and a big gathering of his family who was visiting. We got in the door, and one of bus boys seemed to take notice of us