I've never been much of a T.V. watcher. I do like a few shows, but in my spare moments as brief as they come and go, I like to do rather than just be. This can mean a variety of activities, but what it isn't is me sitting idle for very long. I literally can't. So, it goes without saying I'm not a Netflix binger.
Yet, I often find myself wasting my time idling away the minutes, because I only have maybe 10 here or 5 there to spare. Not enough to begin a new project, but I will need to do a new thing or be a new place in a few minutes. It's a constant low level of frustration for me, to be honest. I am a project planner and finisher, well inside my head I am. In reality I am a frayed mother, a caregiver with chronic illness who is often burning the candle at both ends, but trying to learn to only burn it at one, even if it's a hard process to learn. It goes against the mindset of my constantly busy goal setting brain. My perfectionist self would have me living in a white glove house, perfect manicure, never missing a workout, volunteering for charities, and more. I don't know who that person is, but I make a to-do list for her every day. Hahaha.
I'm finding these few minute gaps in my day to be the most challenging to fill, as odd as it seems. I used to really enjoy spending a few minutes here and there throughout the day checking in on social media. I'd pop in, chat with friends, post a little and be on my way. Now it's a litany of angry political posts, and clickbait articles with mean comments underneath. So, I scroll and I scroll hoping to find
some kind of human connection, but 7 times out of 10 there isn't much of anything personal to be seen. Social media has kinda morphed into an impersonal algorithm of ads and shared political graphics that are half true at best. For me it's become less enjoyable than it used to be, so I need to look for a new way to not only fill those time gaps in my day, but also to find that social connection. Because, yeah.... online is most of my social world outside of my husband, kids and those that associate with them. I'm okay with that. I'm okay with less that that at times, too.
I think a good place to begin for me would be making a list ( I like making lists!) of as many activities or projects that I can think of that I like to do , or might enjoy and work my way through them. As I try out new things, hopefully my time will shift from negative scrolling of social media, and my frustration level will decrease. I also think that the scrolling is partly due to executive functioning issues. Once I start doing it I do have a hard time stopping, even if I am not wanting to continue, which also frustrates me a lot. I need to find something that I find enjoyable that is doable with small amounts of time to be picked up, and left off. Something that is for me.
After some trial and error I will try to remember to come back here for a part two to let you all know how it goes, and what worked, and what didn't.
Do you have any similar issues? What has worked for you?