Saturday, June 10, 2017

Some People are Just Jerks

Something happened recently that caused me to rethink a huge chunk of my philosophy towards human behavior.  It wasn't the event that is important but rather what I took away from it.

I used to believe that 99% of people were inherently good. I thought that there was only the 1% of humans that were so bad it was thorough to their core. I still believe that, to a point. I do think that most people in general possess a conscience that will kick in during serious situation. Situations like murder, rape, and robbery, ect... In general most of us instinctively know those things are wrong, and it would be hard for anyone to even manipulate us into those actions.

But, what about less serious actions?

This is where it gets fuzzy.
For myself, I used to think that usually people do the right thing most of the time, unless they just don't know any better. That is where this incident comes in that changed all that. In a 24 hour period something clicked in my head. I realized that there are a lot (I hesitate to say majority) of humans that know better, could do better, but despite this do harmful things to others for no other reason than they can.

This was shocking to me. Perhaps at my age it should not be. I am not young.

It was such an odd, and kind of dark epiphany to me to realize that sometimes people are just jerks simply because they feel like it sometimes. There is some buy in in that they are often jerks in groups, which makes them feel included against some common denominator, but sometimes it's just them, all alone. No buy in to speak of. They just felt like being a f@cker. It served them in the moment. Maybe it made them feel powerful, or let off some anger they were carrying. I simply don't know.

If you're having a bad day, trying to figure out why someone slighted you, or said some unkind words, or was just hateful for no reason you could be dealing with someone that was feeling like a jerk at the moment, so they let their inner f@cker out. May have been that that person's default is a jerk, and they let their nice person out every now, and then, Who the hell knows. What I do know is that there are many, many people that seem to get a kick out of being nasty to others. There's really not much else to it.


  1. oh so true. i always think that people who im friends with have the same heart and intentions that i do, and i always get let down by that. ive been heartbroken to find that no, not even people i have as friends will treat me as i would treat them. they wont go the literal miles i would go to see them... some because they cant and i understand that and some because they wont... they'll go the miles right past my house and still not take time for me. and i need to learn and keep learning that its just that they arent like me, they dont have the same heart as i do. maybe it goes with my perfectionism that i hold them to the same perfect standard that i hold myself to. its not really fair, even if i should be able to have friends that give enough to me ...

    also made me think of that whole black and white thinking. theres no "middle" in my mind, either yes or no, right or wrong, black or white. :P i dont like gray areas, i cant really sit well with them because i dont understand what they are. :P

    1. Yes, I found it shocking that some people might actually go out of their way to be a jerk to someone else for no real reason at all, because in my mind that is so foreign. It's just so far from any way that I'd ever behave it's almost inconceivable to me.

    2. i know exactly what you mean!
      ive had to learn that i cant expect everyone else to have the same heart as me, and thats been heartbreaking.

    3. It has for me, too. Shocking and saddening for me. Like I had to grieve for the loss of what I thought the world was about.


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