Friday, September 20, 2013

I Found My Courage

After some silent time of contemplation, I am back. 

During that time I thought about what is happening in my life right now, and what it means. The simple fact is, I am a natural born writer, and thinker, but not one that likes spotlights, and controversy.  I like to share, but from a quiet corner. I know that many of have urged me to go to the media with this latest awful situation with Beans, but I have to say that is my last resort, because it is so far out there in my comfort zone that I would literally have to left with no other options, besides defeat. To be honest, I'd almost rather accept defeat than to be on TV talking about such a high conflict situation that is going to bring fire down onto my family.

I don't handle high conflict situations well. What else that I don't handle well is situations where there is a very serious social injustice.  So, I feel that in this case, I am dealing with it whether I want to or not. It's on my doorstep, and isn't going anywhere.I can buck up, and stand my ground, or cower. The consequences for standing up will be harsh. I will be subjected to scrutiny, and I will lose friends, and alliances. Making noise, and being the proverbial whistle blower is not an easy task to carry through.

I thought about all these things the last couple days. I gathered up all of my strength to make the decision to carry on. I have made note of the close friends, and family I thought I had that have not been supportive. I make no apologies to the people that want to get their panties in a bunch when I don't take their advice, or ask them politely not to do something on my personal facebook page. They want to think of only themselves, then that is their right to be selfish, and petty. Fuck them. I won't let them bring me down any longer.

So, I am back. Rested, and ready to go forward, even in the face of adversity. I have to stand up for what is right for Beans, and for all the other kids that this situation has, or will have happened to.


"Human progress is neither automatic nor inevitable... Every step toward the goal of justice requires sacrifice, suffering, and struggle; the tireless exertions and passionate concern of dedicated individuals.
Martin Luther King, Jr."

19 comments:

  1. You know what's best for your family and I'm glad you took the time you needed to regroup.

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  2. Just when I thought you were at the zenith of my respect, you take a step higher. I admire your actions and quiet contemplation very much. I hope this situation is quickly and justly remedied.

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    1. Well said. I wanted to express the same sentiment, but you nailed it. Please let me add my name to your statement.

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    2. Awww. :) *blush* Thank you for your unwavering support. I appreciate it more than you know!

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  3. It's situations like these where you learn who's got your back and who doesn't--better to go ahead and learn that so you can line up your support system to back you as you stand up and fight for Beans and for what is right. It still sucks, though. Hugs.

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  4. This is beautifully expressed and I love the quote at the end.

    I have realised over the years that many people do not understand what it truly means to offer support without advice (unless asked) or judgement.

    Kim has it right though - better to have it sorted now so that you can do what you need to do and know you won't be getting any guff for it.

    You are a very resolute and strong person from what I've seen. I am confident that you will make the right choices for Beans and also for you. I hope that I can provide some support to you if and when you need it during this time and please do not hesitate to ask.

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    1. You always offer, and provide lots of support. Your friendship is very valuable to me. <3

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  5. Not only are you standing up for your child, you also have to be an advocate for yourself. Is anyone else talking about the immense challenges of being a parent with aspergers and navigating advocacy for our children? Every voice counts. I know its shitty to have to be the voice. But you are doing very well.

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    1. So true! Thanks for that perspective, and thanks for your comments. :)

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  6. Welcome Back!!! Yes, the role of whistleblower is not glamorous, but in the end, it's the only way to live. To ignore the wrongdoings that are befalling our children is to be part of the problem. You are STRONG. you GOT THIS.

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    1. No, it's not glamorous. It's also not as cool looking on the inside as one might believe. When I see some situations where the person went all out to the media, and such it seemed they got lots of support, and accolades. I guess that is short term, and probably not longstanding as quietly doing the right thing, and being in it for the long haul. It's a hard road, but we're on the right track.

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  7. Do what you gotta do, hon. You know I'm behind you, 200%.

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