This month has been heavy. January always is, but this year it feels like it's packing an extra oomph to me. I feel ungrounded, lost, anxious and unable to even find a basic direction where relief can be found. That's why I decided it was time. I pulled up my new insurance app and began researching therapy and wellness options. It took some digging, but I was able to find an 8 week program that seems to meet my needs with no out of pocket expense. I haven't been to any sort of therapy for 10-15 years. Usually, I am able to use the tools I've learned previously or find other resources to help me solve issues as they arise. This time I was up to my eyebrows with a whole conglomeration of various emotional struggles and anxieties with little solace from anywhere. It's time to learn new techniques and gather some new tools. It's not anymore layered than that. Life has changed and so have I. My inability to keep pace isn't a failure or anything to feel bad about. It's just a sign that I don't have the set of coping skills I need to feel more confident and successful in my repertoire right now, but I can learn those skills.
If you're going through something similar, I urge you to look for any resources you can access to help yourself get back on track. You don't have to suffer alone. Investing time and energy into improving your well being also raises the well being of everyone whom your presence affects. I'm hoping that I can get to feeling like my best self again and you all can too, if you're not already.
